LOVEGAME (LADY GAGA) + A SPECIFIC JEWISH BOY = ONE HAWT-ASS DANCE

Here's a story all you little children will enjoy and imagine in your little innocent heads. PREPARE YOURSELVES, PUPPETS!

I was sitting in World Geography class, dozing off to the droning of my nice but boring teacher. We were conversing about the Middle-Eastern conflict. And, we all held hands and swayed to the throbbing and thumping of the hair-raising, strangely soothing voices of the BEACH BOYS! It was just a cool, calming, regular day in school. But then, a goofy, wild-eyed boy jumped up! He yanked his iPod Touch out from his crotch-area, a stench emerging along with it. We all watched, terrified, as he pressed "Play", staring into each of our terrorized eyes...
"I WANNA TAKE A RIDE ON YOUR DISCO STICK," the crazy boy with braces shouted, with the most force he could muster. Our teacher slowly gathered us away from this lunatic; this hero urged us to hide behind the desk to shield ourselves from this horrific sight, and to call the SWAT team. To our horror, the crazed boy slowly started to hip-thrust, and hip-thrust, and hip-thrust....
With every thrust of his pelvis, a wall crumbled. Cement disappeared into thin air; insulation poured down from the ceiling like rain during monsoon season. We hid, shaking, underneath the desk. One by one, we each felt our lungs cave in from the tremendous force of the boy's dancing.
20 children died that day.
YES, I'M WRITING THIS FROM HEAVEN! JESUS CHRIST ON EARTH!